in haiti again :)

I love Haiti.  

My return ticket home from Haiti was made for June 13th, 11 days after the Prince of Peace team left, and I didn't know why. 

I could have bought the ticket for June 6th.. it would've been the same price. Or I could have stayed longer. For whatever reason I felt a big YES for leaving on the 13th. As the remainder of my time unfolds it will be interesting to see what God does.  

I told Mrs. Isbell and Mrs. Weiss on our last day together that I felt my head was bloated.  We spent the week gathering information, building relationship, overcoming communication barriers, and trying to grasp the system-of-good that the Lutheran church has dispersed throughout the country of Haiti, that I quite literally felt as if my head would make me topple over because it was so full of thoughts, ideas, concerns, pains, joys... the whole gamut. 

Yesterday the team left early in the morning and I stayed with our creme-of-the-crop chauffeur, Leonard.  A brief reunion with one of my friends from my Discipleship training school from last year was enough to make my heart flip a little.  There's a special bond we all have, all 80 of us, because of the incredibly rich experiences we shared together.  It's one of those things where you can be separated for a long time, not talk, and you get togehter and it's as if no time has passed.  

Haitian Hospitality makes me feel like a princess. Leonard and his wife Reynia made me sleep in their room, while they sleep in the other room where the kids (grown kids) stay. No matter what you seem to say, they will always give you the best of what they have.  It's very humbling. I know Leonard pretty well, but his family I had only met once before. I feel so loved by them all... it's like they've just added me in as the 5th child in the family.  

Leonard's grandson, Teo, is my new best friend. He is 3 years old and he's a dezod (creole for trouble maker).  He is constantly munching on my hair or hanging off my shirt or shooting me with his leggo gun, but I love him. We connect in some special way that bypasses culture, color, age, language.. everything.  He calls me ti nicole (means little nicole) and I call him ti teo.  

My favorite story so far....

I was drinking a Toro (Haitian energy drink that's really tasty), and he asked me what I was drinking.  I said 'Toro'.  There's a picture of a bull on the label and he asked what it was, I said 'bef' (bull in creole). He then asked me if I was drinking ji bef (bull juice).  haha.  So cute.  Then he started crying because he's not allowed to drink ji bef.  

Tomorrow morning I'm getting up early to head north with Leonard, where I'll meet up with a friend of mine and continue my journey with Jesus in Haiti.  Can't wait to see friends from DTS and hopefully meet some more crazy little kids that touch my heart.  

Pray that every heart in Haiti will be set on fire for Jesus.  The people here are wonderful.  Seriously.  If you haven't been, you should come.  

One thing that God is teaching me is the importance of making sure people know they aren't forgotten. If it means spending 5 minutes talking with them, it means something.  God doesn't forget his children.  He puts us in the path of his children. He calls us to love eachother.  Let's do it folks.  

much love. 

ti nicole 

A new "I"

Excitement bubbled in my blood to set forth on a journey which would sever myself from the 18 years of life I'd lived, all to immerse each of my 5 senses, my heart, mind and soul into a foreign land for 153 glorious days.

On the map in my mind's eye, this decision caused a sharp 90 degree turn from the direction I had assumed my life would systematically follow.

My senses, my heart, mind and soul were awakened, transformed, redefined.  

I TASTED

...the much too malted Malta.

...the strangely human-eske chicken feet.

...the chewy intestines.

...the fish sauce spaghetti.

yet also,

I TASTED

...the perfectly doughy and crunchy, heavenly pates.

...the astounding rice and bean sauce. unlike any other. diri ak sos pwa. 

...the 'sugar you up' Couronne soda.

...the gargantuan, flavory savory avocados, coconuts, and mangos.

 I SMELLED 

...the smoke billowing from dumpsters as trash turned to ash.

...the river ways teeming with heaps of rubbish and pigs rummaging about.

yet also,

I SMELLED

...the salty Caribbean waters crashing to shore

...the fine haitian cooking 

I HEARD

...the man speak of the frog living inside his stomach ever since a witchdoctor put a curse on him.

...the pleads for help, for dignity, and unknowingly, pleads for everything that Jesus is. 

...the hollers of a man beating his child

...the gunshots late one night.

yet also,

 I HEARD

...the coffee-bean-bracelet vendor boldly declare the importance for youth to follow God and serve Him with all that they are.

...the man halt his journey somewhere to lift his unrelentingly beautiful voice in praises to God outside the decimated national Palace.

...the Creole worship songs kicking satan's butt

...the people belly laughing , overcome with the joy of the Lord, for hours on end.

I SAW the torments of suffering.

...the cruel multifaceted presence of hunger. People physically deprived of food. Spiritually unfed.  And Emotionally starved. 

...the children descend like a flock of vultures on a pile of chicken bones, gnawing for any last consumable morsel.  

..the young pregnant girl sprawled helplessly on the hard ground inside a structure of sticks with a tarp draped over it, which they call a tent. 

...the sea of women with baskets of fruit on their heads... selling the same thing as the one sitting four feet to their right and to their left.

yet also,

I SAW

...the children living in a tent offer the little bit of food they had to the visitors sitting there in the dirt with them.

...the 19 year old Haitian woman from the biggest slum in the Western Hemisphere, preach for a small church in a country with people who are 'supposed' to hate her, ushering the holy spirit to take over and the fire of God to descend in that place.

...the woman save an unborn life by choosing to adopt, even if it meant relying on God for one more mouth to feed when food for her family was already painfully sparse and infrequent.

...the young teenage boy cling to his faith even after the sudden and tragic death of his younger brother.

I FELT

...the suffocating heat inside of the tents

...the bang on my bones as the machin yo (cars) dipped and dived down and around the countless craters in the roads

...my heart wrench. my heart twist. my heart turn. my heart bleed knowing so many of God's children don't know His love for them. His incredible, unrelenting, overwhelming, consuming love for them... just as they are. 

yet also,

 I FELT

...the cold one gallon bucket showers refresh my entire being.

...the gentle touch of a tiny child reaching for my hand.

...the stream of tears fall down my face with the slightest hint of God's heart for this beautiful country. 

...i felt  .... .... so overwhelmingly blessed by Haiti.

DTS. A Discipleship Training School. The spring board into a season of incredible encounters with God. 

God is good. God is love. God is real. God is so much beyond what I can even begin to comprehend.

But, Once you've smelt of the sweet fragrance that worship is to God, how could you stop offering praise?

Once you've seen God provide your every need, how could you doubt him?

Once you've felt Him shower you with His love, how could you not love Him, too?

Once you've heard the Word, how could you not carry the gospel to the ends of the earth?

Once you've tasted of life sold out to God, how could you ever turn back?

6 months ago I was Nicole Russell. A high school graduate.  A daughter to a mother and a father. A sister to a brother.  A close friend to few. And a Jesus ponderer, wonderer, follower. 

6 months later... "I" has a new definition.

I am a pursuer, lover, seeker, worshiper, and servant of Jesus. A child of God, designed for relationship with my Creator, to receive His love to the point of overflowing, so that His love can spill out, unable to be constrained. 

I'm in this world for the sake of bringing glory to His name.